Institutionalised: hopefulness after hopelessness

The following article is part of INSP’s Changing the Narrative series. It has been written as the result of the new journalism training academy, established in 2025 by INSP to provide people with direct experience of homelessness and poverty the opportunity to learn about journalism and the media, and to enhance their storytelling and written abilities. The training academy has two ambitions: to challenge media and public misconceptions about homelessness; and to tackle the lack of representation and diversity in newsrooms.

It all started when a moved fae Ruchill tae new hoose up Summerston. A went fae huvin baths in the sink wae ma big sister tae a new six apartment hoose, a new school and new mates. You’d think it would huv been a better life but it aw went tae shit fae there.

Me n ma new mates thought we needed as much money as possible, but lookin back we didnae. We were stealin anything tae make money n a got the jail fur the first time when a wis only nine, fur stealin.

A wis out of control fur ma mum n dad so that wis me, in and out of institutions from 1977 on. At first a wis in Larchgrove Assessment Centre in Easterhoose. That wis where it goat put in tae ma heed tae stand up fur maself and tae think the polis were TURDS. A kept runnin away fae Larchgrove cos everybody wis telling me and ma mates wur gony get put away for years and kept away fae ma mum and dad. And a did get put away, for three years as a Convicted Young Prisoner (CYP).

CYP wis life-changing cos a wis put into Kerelaw and wis allowed hame every weekend. But that didny make up fur the abuse they put me through in there. It was too bad to even talk aboot here. That’s how a ended up jaggin heroin and that wis me an addict at 10 years auld. Already set up tae fail.

Efter three years they sent me tae Kibble for another three years fur still bein an unruly boy. A wis meant tae get help in Kibble but a wis in too deep by then so the minute a turned 16 a wis in Glenochil Detention. That wis meant tae be a slap about the heed, wae the screws tryin to turn me intae a man, but it just made me hate them mair fur their brutality. A went fae there roon aboot aw the jails in Scotland fur still thinkin a needed more money n stealin tae get it. A didnae realise this wis ma mental health fae bein an addict. It aw comes back tae bein institutionalised the first time, it was doonhill fae then oan. There a wis, sellin drugs to keep up wae ma addictions - addictions that went fae heroin tae valium and eccys and anyhin else.

A came back tae Glasgow early 2000s to try and ma heed the gether, and tae look efter ma mum and dad cos they wur getting older. A wis still puntin valium but wiz looking efter them until a got the jail again fur puntin. That time a lost ma hoose n everyhin a had.

A wish that a could dae a few things different fae whit aye did. A’d make sure that ere wisnae any kind of madness, madness that ay couldnae stop. Madness that ends up wae children in court at an early age. Maybe out ae 10 prisoners under 16 years old, two or three could end up locked up for many years, fur whit? Fuck aw.Aw a remember aboot the courts is very bad indeed, wae aw the nuggets that thought they were fuckin lawyers. Fur years a wis banged up, eventually put intae the Barlinnie mad hoose.

Efter the Bar-L a wis homeless fur about 11 years. Then aboot five years ago a started getting help fae the Simon Community n wis in n oot ay homeless accommodation. Finally this year a moved intae ma own hoose, which feels brilliant, like fresh air. A cin go oot when a want, n go tae the shop when a want. A became a grandad last year on fathers day n the wee man has changed ma life for the better. Av been volunteerin n its been really gid, something av really enjoyed, n the Simon Community hus been wae me 100%.

This year a won the photography competition fur the Big Issue magazine cover 2026 n that woke me up big time as a never won stuff like that. So now its aw gid at this end, a huv changed ma mood about different things.

May it carry on n on. Amen.